Author Jessica Soffer and Alex Forden’s Intimate Wedding Cruise

There was no way writer and author Jessica Soffer was going to have a traditional wedding: “We aren’t religious, we both have tiny families, and two of the people dearest to Alex are over 97 and would not be able to travel far for it.” The Alex she is referring to is her now-husband Alex Forden, a modern-home builder whom she met in a college English class and married at town hall. “Our relationship started in emails—first about homework,” Soffer notes. “They got increasingly more personal until we were telling each other things we’d never told anyone else and being honest in a way that we maybe wouldn’t have had we gone on a series of dinner dates.” The e-exchanges led to a relationship, and the relationship led to the two moving to New York together to attend graduate school. As Soffer remembers, “We lived in my father’s art studio loft in Soho until my book came out and Alex was offered a job in the Hamptons. We couldn’t pass it up, so we dove headfirst into a renovation project in Amagansett and made the home of our dreams.”

Though they were actually legally married by a judge the previous December and they had celebrated together afterward with champagne and takeout, the wedding party itself took place near the same quaint Long Island town in September the following year. “We wanted to do something different and something that honored us, but that celebrated 10 years of love more generally,” Soffer says. “Our friends are such a huge part of who we are and so is the place we live, so we wanted to pay homage to those two things.”

The couple planned a three-day event. “Everyone stayed within walking distance of our house, and friends hosted activities: yoga on the deck, a group surf lesson, picking flowers and tomatoes at the local farm, and Alex took the guys offshore fishing,” she says. On the last day, Soffer and Forden asked everyone to “be glam” and arrive at their house at 4:00 p.m. for a surprise. Soffer herself wore a minimal two-piece Hervé Léger, of which she says, “I didn’t intend on white. I just wanted to wear something that I wouldn’t wear on any other night—but when I saw it, it felt so right, with vintage lines, and so much like me.” She adds, “I tried red dresses and silk jumpsuits and taffeta skirts, but I couldn’t stop thinking about that amazing white skirt and top.” As for accessories: “My earrings were Elizabeth Cole fish bones for Alex, who lives to fish, and my bracelet was a gift from my mother, who is the most important person in the world to us.”

Once all of the very important people were gathered at their home, a bus transported the group to Sag Harbor and onto a yacht for a sunset cruise, dinner, and dancing. “We drank Dark ’n’ Stormys and had loads of seafood, beer, and sparkling wine from our favorite local purveyors,” Soffer says. “Friends made toasts, and we listened to Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, and Louis Armstrong. We also danced to Motown for hours.”

And the most important dance of the night? “When Beyoncé’s version of ‘At Last’ came on, Alex and I just happened to be in the middle of all the activity, taking it in with our arms around each other, and suddenly, everyone had made a circle around us and we were swaying. We had a totally impromptu first dance.” The ideas of impromptu, casual, and nonchalant were cornerstones of Soffer and Forden’s event. Even their venue was happened upon one day while strolling through Sag Harbor Village. “Alex loves two things above all: salt water and beautiful construction. I love salt water and Gatsby. And here was this boat: a 1920s motor yacht, teak with brass finishes, and lead glass windows—so beautiful, so glamorous, so exactly right.” Midway through the wedding cruise, Soffer remarked to her husband, “I don’t ever want to get off this thing.”

Eventually, the bride and groom did return to terra firma, but the party was far from over. The group walked into Sag Harbor Village and went to their favorite bookstore, Harbor Books. There, among Forden’s cherished Hemingway novels, everyone “toasted, again and again to love.” “I didn’t expect to feel the way I did,” says Soffer. “And here we were, exactly where we wanted to be, with the people we loved most and who made us feel most like us.”